Talking Dirty

Albert Einstein once said, "I get most joy in life out of music."

I am always a bit hesitant to discuss this matter. Typically upon bringing it up I'm stereotyped as a closed minded Christian extremist. The topic is music. Hold on, hear me out. Let's remove the holiness factor out of the equation for a moment and focus solely on common sense. When you workout at the gym, you like fast up beat music, when your wanting time to relax you may play instrumental and when wining and dining your spouse, you play romantic tunes. Get any of these genres in with the wrong activity and your experience might me a bit different. Now that is said, we can agree that music can and has a profound effect on us as individuals and society as a whole. Bands have set fashion trends, patented slogans and influenced the sales of countless products, Why? The answer is twofold; the celebrity status of the artist and the influence of their music. If music can persuade an adult to action or place them in a certain mood, what would you venture its effects are on a developing child, but wait, "I don't listen to the words; it's the beat that I like".

American "Idol" and new comer The Voice, have been game changers for the music industry. Every "would be" singer dreams of making it big, shining in the spot light, riches and fortune. Music today influences so much of our pre-teens and teens identity. One might say that their philosophy of life and interactions with other people are dictated by the music they listen too. Musicians have been called "modern day philosophers" with the power to shape a society and its thought patterns. Every aspect of life is set to a sound track. Adolescence is a crucial stage where finding ones self is the sole objective. Pre-Teens and teens are looking for role models and mentors whom they can pattern themselves after and perhaps find a place to fit in. In our current culture, where identities are up for grabs and adult to teen communication is weak, the media plays an unprecedented role in molding our young people. Many would say they are easily influenced, I would say it's a natural process that if not monitored could have consequences.

No one would conscientiously allow their child to be around explicit language. No parent would rightfully subject their teens to an adult sexual conversation. We monitor our children's peers and their influence, but seldom stop the musician that walks in with them into their bedroom and closes the door behind them. Today, 8-18 year-olds devote an average of 7 hours and 38 minutes (7:38) to using entertainment media across a typical day (Kaiser Foundation). The big increase in music consumption has come as a result of mobile media, with YouTube music videos capturing two-thirds of adolescent viewers. We may monitor our teens friends and their where a bout's, but we have neglected the message being ministered to them on a regular basis.


Radio version lyric excerpts from today's top artist:

NICKI MINAJ - SUPER BASS
And I think I like him better with the fitted cap on
He ain't even gotta try to put the mac on
He just gotta give me that look, when he give me that look
Then the panties comin' off, off, unh

RIHANNA - S&M
Cause I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it
Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it
Sticks and stones may break my bones
But chains and whips excite me

FLO RIDA - WHISTLE
Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby
Let me know
Girl I'm gonna show you how to do it
And we start real slow
You just put your lips together
And you come real close
Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby
Here we go

KATY PERRY - TEENAGE DREAM
Let's go all the way tonight
No regrets, just love
We can dance until we die
You and I, we'll be young forever

BRUNO MARS - LOCKED OUT OF HEAVEN
'm born again every time you spend the night
Cause your sex takes me to paradise
Yeah your sex takes me to paradise

USHER - SCREAM
Got no drink in my hand, but I'm wasted
Gettin' drunk off the thought of you naked
I'll getchu like ooh baby baby, ooh baby baby
A-ooh baby baby, ooh baby baby

CHRISTINA AGUILERA - YOUR BODY
So don't even tell me your name,
All I need to know is whose place,
And let's get walking...
All I wanna do is love your body
Oooooh ooooh oooooh oooooooh
Tonight's your lucky night, I know you want it
Oooooh ooooh oooooh oooooooh

PITBULL - INTERNATIONAL LOVE
Can't I be on looking for visa's?
I'm ain't taking credit cards, if you know what I mean
En Cuba la cosa esta dura
But the woman get down, if you know what I mean

Many might say "I cannot stop them. They are going to do what they want anyway" or "I listened to secular music, and I am not that bad", but the truth is our teens are consumed on purpose by an industry. These artists have become part of our teens "clique" and speak volumes of adult topics, all while set to guitar riffs and dub step beats. Many have argued that they are too young to understand what "whips and chains" entail or that "whistle baby" means nothing at all. It may go over their heads at first, but as stated early, YouTube is a main source for music and there are suggestive and explicit video's which leave no room for the imagination. The old cliché goes that "if you hear a lie long enough you'll believe it". In an effort to stay current and up-to-date, we parents go against our better judgment and gamble with the sounds blasting from our pre-teens headphones. Music artist sing candidly about sex with no consequences. Losing ones virginity is glorified because YOLO (you only live once). All consequences, all responsibility, all accountability is thrown to the wind, cause tonight just feels right (sorry a bit sarcastic). Celebrities seem invincible and immune to the consequences of their suggestive lyrics.

As a parent you do have influence. You are the first people your kids look up to you and you are the first they are to believe. By understanding your role, you can set guidelines and parameters so your teen is raised in a positive environment. As parents, we have the right and the obligation to monitor such entertainment. As a youth pastor/ counselor of over 10 years, I have repeatedly seen the effects of media. The music industry spends billions marketing our teenagers. The only thing they have got right is that they say "it's not their responsibility to censor the artist, that's the job of the parents" and that's my point exactly. Our kids require and desire guardianship. They require that we as parents have their best interest at heart and are setting them up for success. We are to raise our teens, not the music industry. Extreme sells, sex sells and it is our kids that are left holding the bill.

Things to consider when addressing this subject:

1. Be informed, just saying "you can't listen to that" will not work. Look at the song lyrics, then sit down together and discuss. If you don't understand some of the lyrics, ask your teen what they think it means.

2. Research the bands. Find interviews and articles that discuss your teen's favorite artist. Let your teen know that your recommendations are legitimate, logical reasons and not just that you simply don't like that type of music.

3. Consider sharing what one mom said, "Leave your phone at home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Download music that is new or classic and different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff.

4. Lastly, compare their favorite artist lyrics to scripture and guide them in making intelligent comparisons and decisions. Allow them to recognize the contrast and how it has and may effect them.

Philippians 4:8 (AMP)
For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].

Additional Information:
Being plugged into an iPod is a hallmark of adolescence, but a new study suggests that teens who spend too much time listening to music may be at higher risk of depression.
http://healthland.time.com/2011/04/12/study-are-music-loving-teens-more-likely-to-be-depressed/#ixzz2IrKbdGpV